Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Randomize
