We're like a lot better than the average bears
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Randomize
