i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize
