She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Randomize
