so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
where does the pee come out of this thing
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize