i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
