those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
