love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
