Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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