Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
she pinky promised me she was 18
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
