these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
