Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
