Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
well you can't waste a boner
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
