I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
