part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
i used baking grease as lip gloss
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
