Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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