420 ftw
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
