The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
