A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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