:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
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