just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
