Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
