Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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