Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Randomize
