Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
