32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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