Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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