are you still at the devil's house?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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