Sponge bath it is.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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