Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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