her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
