We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
