everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Randomize
