how hairy? two words: wookie tits
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Just invented taco cereal.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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