went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
