Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize