Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
