Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
