i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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