She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
