Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
