He is such a slut. More and more my type.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
