I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
