end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
