I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize