Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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