woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
