Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
