ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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