i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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